The (un)true story of why Hasbulla punched his cat

By BSNN Staff

This is the (un)true story of why Hasbulla punched his cat.

Paddy the Baddy had always been a talented fighter, but his size was always a disadvantage in the mixed martial arts world. Even moreso driven by dreams of defeating his nemesis and the first champ in new Picogram weightclass, Hasbulla. He was eager to find a way to gain an edge over his opponents, and eventually, he heard rumors of a powerful wizard, “Ryan”, who could grant him his wish.

Paddy was excited at the prospect of finally being able to compete at the highest level, so he sought out the wizard and asked for his help. The wizard listened to his plea and agreed to help him, but warned him that the process would be difficult and potentially dangerous, but he shrugged and got to work.

Paddy was willing to take the risk, showever, something went horribly wrong during the transformation, and when it was over, Paddy found himself transformed into a small, fluffy cat.

Paddy was shocked and terrified. He had never expected this to happen, and he had no idea how to reverse the process. He tried to speak, but all that came out was a soft meow.

The wizard was horrified at what had happened, and he tried to reverse the process, but it was no use. Paddy was stuck as a cat. The wizard, then swiftly fled the scene twitching slightly and muttering expletives.

At first, Paddy was devastated by his new form. He couldn’t fight anymore, and he was powerless to do anything except meow and purr. Some might say not much different than his recent performance in the octagon. But as time went on, he began to adjust to his new life as a cat. He found that he could still be fierce and determined, even in his new form.

One day, he summoned enough courage to face his opponent, even if he couldn’t do it inside the octagon. Soon thereafter while walking through the woods, Hasbulla heard a strange sound coming from a nearby bush. As he approached, a demonic cat leaped out and attacked him, its eyes glowing with a menacing red light.

Hasbulla knew he had to act fast. Hasbulla quickly drew his golden gun and prepared to defend himself. The cat circled him, its claws bared and ready to strike, but in the end it did fookin nothing.

Hasbulla breathed a sigh of relief realising that the cat was not just any ordinary feline, but a demon sent by an evil sorcerer who ruled over the neighboring kingdom “Jon”.

With the evil defeated, Hasbulla returned home, hailed as a hero by all who knew himAnd able to enjoy many boorgurs with cheese and kooky-colas with ice, now that his bowels had been emptied.